Making a big decision is hard precisely because *mournful music plays* you’re losing something no matter what. Decisions are easy when one option is clearly worse than the other. Should we buy this house with a giant hole in the floor? Should I have an affair with my husband’s brother? Should I drive home after six beers? But those aren’t the choices most people get stuck on.

We get stuck when both Option A and Option B offer possibilities, opportunities, rewards. FOMO kicks in! Let’s say you’re deciding between two appealing job offers. Or you’re choosing between moving to a city with a beach and a city with an amazing restaurant scene. And so you wonder: what if the job I don’t pick is my perfect job? What if that other city is where I would be happier? What if what if what if??!!!!!

So—how do we choose between two great options? In other words, how do we turn down something good?

Here are six suggestions.

1. Ask yourself: do I actually HAVE to choose? Sometimes you can do both, if you think creatively about it. Maybe you turn two great job offers into one great job and one great contracting gig. If you’re going to turn one employer down anyway, you have nothing to lose. So why not ask if they can transform that offer into something you can do? Maybe a part-time gig that’s only the parts of the job you love the most!

2. But if you DO have to choose, you’re going to have to face the uncomfortable feeling of missing out on something. This is built into the system, unfortunately; there’s not really any way of getting around it. A reminder for you: Sometimes you have to turn down something good to get something great. Remembering that this is an unavoidable part of the process can help.

3. Ask yourself: which of these options has the most potential? Sure, both choices are good, but is there one that could lead to BIG things? One that offers a chance, even if it’s a small one, to fast-tracking your journey to your most ambitious goal? That’s the one to pick.

4. I recently had a client who was choosing between working for a friend’s business and starting her own. The friend was business savvy, had lots of experience, was super smart. But deep down, my client wanted to do her own thing—be the boss, make the decisions, create the product. She didn’t want to be a participant in someone else’s dream project. But she was stuck because what if her friend’s business made it big? What if it took off? What if everyone involved became a millionaire?! She’d be filled with regret, even if she was doing well with her own company.

I made a suggestion. Could she change the words “what if” to “even if”? So, instead of thinking “what if I miss out, what if she sells it for billions, what if I feel regret,” reframing all those worries as “even if I miss out, even if she sells it for billions, even if I feel regret, ______” And then filling in the blank with what she’d do. She’d carry on, work harder, be OK. “What if” is a phrase filled with fear and questioning. “Even if” is a phrase filled with confidence and assurance. If you’re afraid of missing out on something good, try it out.

5. Acknowledge the loss. Grieve the opportunities and possibilities that you won’t get to experience. You’re allowed to do that! And, in fact, it can make you feel better. Feeling sad after a big decision happens all the time, but it doesn’t mean you made the wrong choice. You’re just mourning the loss of the other option. It’s OK!

6. And a final practical tip, one that I give to clients all the time. Once you’ve made the decision between two great options, while it’s fresh in your mind, write down all the reasons you picked the one you did. Put that list somewhere where you’ll see it frequently. It’s a reminder that you had excellent reasons for making the decision you made, and that you’re on a good path. Never underestimate the power of a post-it ;)